It's been a week/month/year

Cancer, MS and a ruptured appendix

Life has a way of life-ing.

No matter my plans (your plans) things come into my orbit that derail me. Sometimes it is in fits and starts (a work issue here, a spat with my husband there) but this week? Katy bar the door.

For the last few months I’ve known one of my brothers was diagnosed with prostate cancer. Cancer. Here’s the thing about cancer. It is everywhere in my family. Everywhere. It’s a joke (l.o.l) between the siblings: “So Who Is Next?”

• My dad died of pancreatic cancer,

• My mom? Two bouts of breast cancer - earlier this year she had a mastectomy. She figured might as well just take the right one - it’s not like she’s using it anyway (we are a grim bunch of disease comedians).

• She came through with flying colors.

• Then, my brother’s diagnosis.

• It’s well known in the Those Of Us Steeped In Cancerland community that if one is to get cancer as a man prostate is the one you want.

We finally found out his hasn’t spread, there will be surgery, but that is hopefully that. May not need any of the radiation, chemo, etc. My cousin is currently going through with HIS prostate cancer just two years after his brother, my other cousin died of colon cancer.

Whew! Right?

Not so fast Andy (Ms. Kopsa if you’re nasty)!

My daughter is a grown-ass woman - she reminds me all the time “Mom, I am 33!” (I was very young - yes a teen mom, and no I do not recommend it). She reminded me of this again after sending me the following text:

“I had my appendix taken out yesterday. It ruptured and I’m still hanging in the hospital. Just letting you know!”

Along with a picture of her in a hospital gown giving the thumbs up from her post-op bed.

I would expect nothing less from this child of mine because this is exactly something I would do - but on the receiving end of this text? I nearly dropped over dead.

I wanted to get on a plane (she is in the great progressive state of Minnesota, therefore, thank god she has access to affordable healthcare through the expansive marketplace) and go there. Immediately! Rupture? Jesus H. Christ.

Long story short: she is home, she is good, and sending me cat memes. But I literally shut down. I went and lay in my bed and fell asleep in the middle of the day. This isn’t like me at all. But my brain couldn’t take it. I died for about two hours and then, woke up wondering “Where am I??”.

And now? Now my MS is flaring up. It’s the heat for the most part, but also just part of living with an invisible disease. Right now? My left hand isn’t fully operational. It is doing an okay job with the keypad but you know, it could stand a few more neural connections. Alas severed, cannot be mended.

And I hate it.

My motto is I’m just striving toward mediocrity over here.